Settle is one of the most ugly verbs that exist. It is a painful Word and that it is hard to pronounce, since it expresses that we no longer fight, having ideals and find what makes us happy. In short, it means that have stopped working beside our illusion.
Sadly, this is something that often happens in the relationships. We give up, we give up and, as a result, we are satisfied with situations that we should not pass.
It is rather basic: to make a relationship last our exchanges must occur from the affection, understanding and confidence. Sometimes we forget this and routine allows us to relax in certain mutual love, respect and consideration samples that we should never let disappear.
But the truth is that sometimes have muca hurry to resolve conflict situations and "return to normal", even if that means going through the hoop. To that couple you are demanding people frowned by society, we will have a perfect bomb that will explode conformity.
Then there is that of "biological clocks", "the solterones", "the marriage in adulthood," and the importance of finding "our other half" that it requires us to match us in desperation.
To these dilemmas, it is not surprising that we put before you find to our perfect combination. But today we are going to bring some reasons that you may understand that you are or not in a relationship, you don't have to give up what makes you feel fully well.
1. the fear of being alone can mess up our priorities
Are convinced that not having companions in life is something terrifying. In fact, there are few things that flood us more than sadness and compassion that observe a person in solitude.
We don't know (or don't want to) consider the possibility of having no partner, walking alone through life; for this reason, frightens us with people who prefer to cling to his hand.
Very common is that we think "it is passing rice, train or the time to find the love of our lives" or "the older we are, the more difficult it will be find someone".
The need and the fear of being alone is appears to have collapsed easily, therefore lead us to seek in desperation a couple that will help us to meet these vital and emotional deficiencies that it seems we raised.
Our relations are not fed of need, but preferably.
It is understandable that we seek to establish close contacts, because we are social animals and naturally we feel the need for affiliation. However, when the fear of being alone impels us to start a relationship, will end up choosing perishable relations, which depressed us and that, even make us vulnerable.
2 be unmarried has many advantages
It is true that company yourself helps discern what you want and what not in the life, as well as to respect and defend themselves.
Singleness is filled with disadvantages for the prejudices that surround it. It is assumed that if you are single you are a person not adapted, immature and selfish. Obviously, this is completely wrong, unfair and, to a large extent, discrimination.
The subjugation of the society to singles reaches such a point that, for example, is much more complicated to get a single bank credit that in marriage.
However, being single is a temporary state or a choice of life; something which, for its part, offers us the possibility to create strong ties with our friends, dedicate ourselves to ourselves in depth, cultivate our hobbies, etc.
As a result, it is likely that generate higher self-esteem and a greater sense of identity, which provide us with the choice of your partner without being slaves of the expectations and ideals.
3 wait for true love is a risk that is worth taking
It is true, expect a true love is risky. However, the price we have to pay to settle with any love is too high.
Comply with an unhappy relationship because you've already invested a lot in it is like continue to invest in a company that is bound to the bankruptcy. You will lose something valuable, it is inevitable, but is that what is at stake are you and your happiness. Is it worth? Obviously, anyone in their right mind would say that not.
So, think if what you unites is the fear loneliness, intolerance to uncertainty, the aversion to risk and loss or the ideal of romantic love.
4 accept the other as it is does not conform
We all have strengths and weaknesses and, as such, us whoever we accept. Usually, we are perfectionists too about the qualities you want in your partner. As a result, we may reject potential mates by purely superficial reasons.
Not be too high will not be so important, in the long run, such as a kindly person. However, do not take into account these "defects" does not mean having to settle, but love is to see that a complete person.
We are not nor a lot of defects or a lot of virtues, but that we are a great landscape to behold. What we have to do is assess whether with someone we feel good, comfortable and happy.
We are complete beings, not half oranges
Chosen loneliness is great because it helps you know yourself, nurture yourself and trust in you as a bubble of protection. Don't need not have partner to choose solitude, you can have a fully relational life but need to reserve a few minutes a day or a week for you.
In short, it's enjoying moments of intimacy rather than solitude. And not only is an option, but that it is truly recommended for everyone.
Indeed, despite what society tells us, accompany ourselves is something extremely desirable and, of course, the only way to achieve inner balance. And this is much more important, if we are still waiting for the arrival of a great love.
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