Love as emotional prison

Why do we feel the need that someone reign in our hearts? How can we give so easily our well more precious? Are we not fantasizing with a Prince charming that we rescue from the dungeons of the dragon?

As well, the Prince charming does not exist, but the dragon is still among us. And it is that today is the day in which fear our emotions and our emotional dependency us, holds us in his Castle and prevents us contemplating another world that is not what we see from the top of the tower. That Yes, encandenados.

We sometimes do not fell in love, we slaves us

Why can we keep feeling the need to emotionally dependent on one or more other people throughout our lives? The dragon, which does not exist, is not your fault that we not leave abroad but it has it our minds to create that Dragon.
However, we hope not only that the hero of the day we rescue from the clutches of the horrible dragon. We also want to protect us forever. Why? Because we feel helpless, beings prepared for what we believe that it is love, but not to be loved, but safeguarded.
After a time, we realize that the person who believed that he could save us from the only dragon has managed to put it. But that has not prevented to continue perceiving the foul smell and the unmistakable heat than our Monster emanates.

Without a doubt we are before an imaginary monster which, even if they are within our minds and our hearts, will continue to haunt us until we make to you front.

The only way to get rid of our dragon is to start eating you land, in such a way that you feel each time closer to our courage and our determination to fully enjoy our life and emotions. That will destroy it.

Love and dependence are incompatible: if they coexist, are destroyed

We must learn to enjoy ourselves, alone and in company, and avoid that our happiness depends on others. We have to impose sanity and tie in short our Dragon, preventing that you enslave us and choosing be masters of ourselves.
Love does not have to become our emotional prison. If this happens, although the relationship remain, love darkens and shall be submitted to the Agency.
Is change the need for preference, which is much healthier. No one is in this world to meet our expectations or our needs. It is a huge responsibility that corresponds exclusively to ourselves.

"They were led to believe that each of us is half of an orange, and that life only makes sense when we find the other half. Not they told us that we are already born whole, which no one in life deserves to carry the responsibility of completing what we lack behind "

John Lennon

Anyway, as we said earlier, have the mentality that love has to be a fairy tale, princesses and princes, a world Disney magical in that in the end all goes well.

But that's 'they were happy and ate partridges' only occurs in the stories that we tell children. Real couples can, and often, creating harmful dynamics that encourage emotional dependence.
Don't we realize, because we think that the right thing is to feel safe and full and having someone on our side, but the truth is that is the only person that we need to live our selves.
This is the reason why we have to be aware that we are real people with real lives, and that our happiness depends on us exclusively. Thus, if we were able to leave is required and start to prefer, we cultivate long lasting relationships based on true love, respect and acceptance.

Love is not a synonym of falling in love

In the first phase of love, falling in love, there is a great emotional dependency: there is nothing that one make without the other knowing it and vice versa, you want to share absolutely everything and the more time passes together, better.
At this early stage, This is natural and even Adaptive, as the friction makes the affection and the more we share in the early days, most going us and fell in love.
It happens that, as time passes, this need is not such. Is in these moments that we turn dependence into a must for our relationship. We wonder what is wrong, why have no desire to spend hours on the phone, write love letters and unleash our passion in every moment.

Then we try to keep all these behaviors that played before us but that now we drown, without realizing that we are killing our essence and that of our partner.
The source of our concern is that at this stage there are no butterflies or delivers total and we find it difficult to get out of there. While it does us damage, continue walking gang, because we fail to understand that love is not needed, but prefer.

Love is not drowning, does not have and is not sacrificed. Love is calm, reason, desire, friendship, care and balance. In love there is no fear or obsession and that is worth the change.

Self-love is a trophy

"Love oneself is the beginning of a romance that lasts a lifetime"

Oscar Wilde

To love oneself is not a privilege that is reserved to a few. Self-esteem is a trophy that is always within reach.
We can love, and even adore your partner but, at the same time, have to keep a good self-esteem from which cultivate our personal growth, mature couple, and move forward as a people.
To love and to love your partner is not at odds. In fact, doing so is respected fully and ensure that the relationship is going to work and there will be a mutual submission. Loving ourselves will make us ask many things; among others, in love, not everything is permitted.

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